Dear Conservatives,
So you’re all up in arms that Donald Trump is speaking at
your conference. You’re tweeting
that “CPAC is dead” and that the organization is “destroying” itself. You worry that Donald Trump is going to
make a mockery of Conservative values and policy (as if that’s even possible).
Look, I’m with you. I think Donald Trump is one of the
biggest buffoons modern society has offered us in a while. And I’ve always said
that, regardless of what label he’s stuck on himself over the years. The earliest
memory I have of what it really
meant for a man to be a pig is Donald Trump when he cheated on Ivana. So I get
why you’re speaking out against him being touted as a leader of the party. What
I don’t get is why the hell it took you so long. When he was running around
demanding the president’s long-firm birth certificate, why didn’t you say,
“Hey, The Donald. We have serious things we have to worry about in this country
right now. Hawaii’s a state, he was born here legally, that video from Kenya
was bullshit. Now stop.” You can’t hate him now that he’s calling himself an
Independent when he was worthy of our hate the whole time he was a Republican.
Sometimes you get the leader you asked for. And you asked
for The Donald. A businessman who declares bankruptcy and then rails against
entitlement. A man who declares how important family values are as he stands right
next to his umpteenth wife. You’re letting the party be held hostage by these
Tea Party lunatics who run around in tri-cornered hats and talk about how the
Founding Fathers always intended this country to be God-fearing and racist
(when we all know only one of those things is true). You’re letting asshole
pundits prevent Congress from working across the aisle. You won’t give a centenarian
who waited hours to vote a standing ovation because she voted for the wrong
team. Your lead Congressman rolls his eyes at the idea that our basic infrastructure
needs improvement because President Obama suggested it. Our country went into
sequester because nobody could even agree to call a frigging time out.
If you don’t want a clown to represent your party, stop
running it like a circus.
Hugs and Kisses,
Lindsay
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